Tales from Beta Reader: Circe
by storm-brain
Summary: Circe gasped. “And fanfiction is trash.” Beta cuddled the guinea pig, glaring at her. “What do you want on fanfiction, then?” “No men!” She snapped. “They all worship men. Find one story with no men characters in it, and I will leave you alone.”


**This is for bubblegum11. SOrry for the delay. **

Circe stood, surveying her island calmly. Everything was in working order. One of her guinea pigs had been sold to a third grade classroom, she had caught several more women, and five men were squeaking in the cage across the room. Everything was going smoothly, she thought, as she left the room to go talk to her web master.

She had washed up several years ago, now, and had been working on Circe's web site ever since. Web design, it seemed, was not as useless a talent as she had thought. Her sales had increased quite a bit with the production of CCguinea.

She walked briskly along the shore, looking for her. And there- ah ha!- was Joyce of the computer bug. Circe walked up to her, then slowed. Someone was talking to her- or more rightly, floating in the air beside her. Circe vaguely recognized this spiritual form from a picture on the front of Olympus Weekly a few months ago. She was a new muse of FanFanfiction or something. What was her name? Better Reader? Beta fish? Something like that. not being infected with the writing bug, Circe hadn't given it much thought. But here she was, distracting one of her minions.

This was just not okay.

"Joyce?" Circe asked, and Joyce looked at her, eyes a little fogged up; she was thinking of something else.

"Yes, C.C.?" She asked, curious.

Circe explained the updates she needed done on the web site, and Joyce nodded. The muse hovered in the air, waiting.

"Muse?" Circe said rudely after Joyce started working, and the muse descended, taking on a solid form.

"My name is _Beta Reader,_ guinea pig maker." She snapped.

"touché. My name is Circe, Muse." Circe said sarcasticly.

"I know who you are, guinea pig maker." Beta Reader said frostily, putting her hands on her hips.

"Why are you distracting my workers? They have jobs here, you know, and can't spend all their time writing _fan fiction._" She said the last two words with disgust, spitting on the ground in an unlady like manner.

"Why are you turning men in to guinea pigs?" She countered, scooping an escapee up and offering him some lettuce.

"How did he get out?" Circe demanded, eyeing the ball of fluff warily.

"They are still people, you know." Beta leaned up against a wall of a pavilion, glaring at her. "If you wanted I could make every person on this island, and everywhere in the world write a fanfiction with you as the bad guy. Where would you be then?"

Circe opened and closed her mouth a moment, speechless.

"I could write a detailed and offensive fanfic about your… relationship… with Odysseus."

"That was two thousand years ago!" Circe snarled, furious. "Homer had no business writing that down! None at all!"

Beta looked at her calmly.

"Then watch your mouth."

Circe gasped. "And fanfiction is _trash_."

Beta cuddled the guinea pig, glaring at her. "What do _you_ want on fanfiction, then?"

Circe stared, thinking. She had not read many, but they all stared her living nightmare; Percy Jackson. Or else some other half blood taking daring quests.

"No men!" She snapped. "They all _worship_ men. Find one story with no men characters in it, and I will leave you alone."

Beta watched her with interest. "Are you feeling that your gender is misunderstood? Find a fanfiction with no women characters."

Circe gaped at her, then pulled her laptop out of her bag and started the internet.

"Here!" She pointed, then paused. "And… _there! And this one! What do you have to say for yourself?" _Beta stared at her.

"Um, the male gender is popular right now?" She asked, stroking the guinea pig's short red-brown fur. Circe snorted, reaching for the pig. Beta stepped back, holding it tight.

"It's mine!" C.C. snapped, and Beta shook her head.

"No, it was a person. A real person, real thoughts, real body. You messed it up, but that doesn't make it yours."

Circe glared at her. _No one_ spoke to her like this. _No one_. And especially a conceited muse.

But said conceited muse was not done.

"I will, however, trade." She offered. "I will have an all-girl fan fiction written, making your opinions heard. In return, I get the pig."

"Blackmail." Growled Circe. "You could just take the pig anyway."

"I thought I was being generous. You get a fanfiction, and don't feel wronged."

"Fine." Circe sniffed, stalking back into her palace and leaving the muse and the pig behind in the sun.

O-o

While Circe was angrily reading fanfictions, Beta Reader and her new sidekick, Arnold the ex-fifteen year old, went to **bubblegum11**, and inspired him to PM storm-brain with this idea.


End file.
